Sunday, January 10, 2016

When they see us coming the birdies all try and hide

This morning, LD made waffles using her waffle iron and the mixer I got her for Christmas.  She put cheese and bacon in the waffle batter and we tried to fry eggs in the waffle iron on top of the waffled, which was perhaps a mixed success.

We went for a walk to small city park with fountains and a small lake, taking along Dog and Dumb Dog.  The later barked his high-pitched, hysterical bark at the ducks and geese, and even ran at the heron, who lazily flapped across the lake when he approached.  At last, he jumped into the very cold water to chase the ducks, but since he was on a leash, he didn't get very far.

On the way back, we saw a coyote wandering past some houses, right there in broad open daylight. DD barked and pulled at the coyote, who was very chill for a feral beast.  He padded around, looking for an exit, and then just curled up in  somebody's flower bed right by the driveway.  He looked at us languidly, with no apparent concern, as four humans and two dogs (one yelping and straining) passed on the other side of the street.

When we got home, Crab and I washed both dogs in the tub.  Wet dog doesn't smell very good but once they dried it was a real improvement.  Which is better be, because washing two large dogs is a laborious, wet ordeal, and not at all the comic craziness of movies and TV ads.

Saturday, January 09, 2016

Let the new night bring you peace and the promise of tomorrow

Hey, we had dinner with 74 and Zaftig again!  Crab, Cake, and K Jr wanted a playdate with their kids, Nora and D, so LD brought them over, and I drove over there a bit later.  74 cooked fried chicken; he is a quite talented amateur cook.

Later, when the adults were out on their patio with the fire going (despite the fact that it was cold as David's marble balls out there), Zaftig brought up the issue of getting Kraut dating again.  This is an awkward subject but a consummation devoutly to be wished on all fronts, including mine, as it would reassure everyone that he was really All Right and at least somewhat happy.  And I do want Kraut to be happy.

Zaftig said that he is on all the traditional dating sites, but is having a great deal of trouble finding anyone.  This I cannot understand.  Yes, he has three kids and is separated, both of which are probably minuses in the dating world.  But he is tall and well-educated and foreign and well-traveled and makes fairly good money and has a cute accent. Yes, he is also a bit crazy and prone to having no filter, telling others with alacrity about his blurry marital status and stint in a mental hospital.  But surely those impulses can be reined in for dating purposes until his good nature shines through?  And he really does have a good nature.

As LD and I said, if the drama teacher at Prestigius, a King Dork if there ever was one, can get dates, then anyone can.  Of course, I don't think Drama Teacher is particular about looks or weight, and he wants Friends with Benefits arrangements, which Kraut doesn't.

Anyway.  Here's hoping he gets an OK Cupid like or whatever it is.

Around ten, we left, taking Cake and Crab.  K Jr asked to spend the night, and his dad would pick him up in the morning for some Boy Scour religious ceremony.  Cake and Crab are not allowed to spend the night because of an epic meltdown Crab had a few months ago while staying with Nora.  I had to come get her at 2:00 a.m. in the morning.  She just wanted to be home.  So now she isn't allowed to no be home at night.

Friday, January 08, 2016

We still have half a chance

Tonight, LD and I were sans kids, so we went out to dinner at an Indian restaurant with 74 and Zaftig, showing conclusively that, pace this post, I am not and probably will never be "fucking done with those people."  I guess it's good to have friends, even if there remains an undercurrent of uncertainty born of judgmental finger-wagging and melodrama.

The restaurant is one LD and I had been to once before (with Muffin and her husband, who seems to have no name on this blog; can that be right?  I shall name him Big Red).  It has very high quality food and polite, if unexceptional, service from the Indians who staff the place.  This night, however, we were served by a rather haggard-looking Euro-American woman who looked as though she should be slinging hash at an truck stop.  And she did her job as though she would be fired from an IHOP.  She failed to bring me tea until the end of the meal and was very lackluster with other orders.  But that is all minor and forgivable; her attitude was pretty terrible.  She said, "I haven't drank any of those cocktails" when asked for a recommendation,and when 74 asked how her New Year was, she grumpily replied, "I had to work."

She brought the celebratory atmosphere down a few degrees, but we all tipped 20% or more anyway.  I mean, we're not monsters.

Speaking of money, the bill was very high.  We quartered it, and everyone's share was $50.  LD and I shared an entree and I only had tea, so I think the restaurant charged us for the bottle of wine that Zaftig ordered and then sent back as unpalatable.  74 and Zaftig, being rather flush with cash, don't much notice a few hundred dollars here and there, but for us upper-middle-class working stiffs, these things add up, and we end up thinking about such situations hours later and then writing about them in our little anonymous, kvetching blogs.

Thursday, January 07, 2016

Lately I've been in a life like limbo, looking out of a smudged up window

Yesterday's answer was: Tom Waits, "Time."  Kurt got it right.


I got a tea ball and some loose leaf tea grown and packed in China.  I love the tea ball!  I'm a tea baller now.  I'm ballin' tea right now.


"Sweetie, I love you, but your tendency to blow things out of proportion is not something I can deal with when we are not together." --- text from LD

Reasonable brain: "She's right. I should get a sense of perspective."

Sad sensitive brain: "Then don't send me passive aggressive, annoyed texts that you know will set me off in the first place, you jerk!"

Real brain: [wisely does not reply at all]


Mr. Richard, the science teacher, and I have set up an after-school class.  Well, "class" is stretching it. It is an hour-long outdoor game activity.  We thought up variants of different playground games, and are letting first- and second-graders go wild with them.  For this we are getting paid $60 each.

In some ways I have it unreasonably good.

Wednesday, January 06, 2016

Well she said she'd stick around until the bandages came off

Ten years have gone by.

When I started this blog, I was an adult, but so young.

I was coy about my age, but now I am middle and there is no denying it.

My hair is streaked with grey.

My relationship is not where I want it to be and is still precarious and uncertain.  Some days it is heaven and some days it just seems like pain.

I am very much a younger sibling, a hurt and torn child, the product of a childhood that was composed of derisive stares and mockery.  I am needy and demanding and --- now, in a total reversal --- prone to breaking down in tears at setbacks.

Is this a dream or a prayer?

I haven't become emo.  It's just a meditation.  More tomorrow, or in a week, or in ten years.

Monday, November 03, 2014

Soften a bit until we all just get along

At work, we had a video conference with another school.  We had done a little art swap project with them, where our kids made something and then sent directions to them, and vice versa, then our kids made their artwork, and they made ours.  We showed the attempts to follow directions and replicate art, and then the kids told each other about their respective schools.  Since Prestigius is a fancy-pants private school in the big city, and our conference pals were at a public school in a small town in a struggling state, I think the other teacher got a bit peeved at how much our kids talked about all their classes and the spacious grounds and opportunities and so on.  I said, "No, we're jealous of you!  Your school sounds great!"  At which some of my kids screamed, "No it doesn't!"

I chastised them severely for this afterwards.

Later, the adults got into a tizzy fit because some people's scheduled were inconvenienced by the video conference project, and --- mea culpa --- I failed to adequately warn them that this would be happening.  (Although I still feel that should have been the tech teacher's purview.  She is extremely half-assed and lazy.  My excuse is that I am a bonehead.)  Educated adult drama!  People with zero problems making trouble!  It would be amusing if it weren't so stupid.


LD got a sitter to watch her kids while she worked late, and she came by my place before heading home.  We were both a bit stressed out and distracted, especially her of course, and so her visit was a bit awkward, but we sat and talked and I think I made her feel a little oasis of comfort and calm.  At least I hope so.

Sunday, November 02, 2014

Old lady judges watch people in pairs

Today I had to go to work because we had an Open House for prospective parents.  I wore my shiniest shirt and crisp checkered shoes.  Or possibly the other way around.  Anyway, my ostensible role was to greet any touring prospects and answer their questions about third grade. Ms. Yule had the shift before me and told me that she fielded a few queries, but since most of the prospects had children aged 0-3, really very few had any interest in finding out about third grade just yet.  So I ended up standing around like an ugly male caryatid saying barely two words to any adults.  I did engage in a bit of persiflage with the Prestigius students that were attending, but that was about it. Afterwards I stayed and got Monday's spelling words and homework ready.


But!  Before that, I drove up to LD's house.  Eyeball had taken KJr out for a fishing trip (indoors somehow, as I understand it), so I went out to lunch with the three girls.  I really like Crab a lot.  I mean, Cake is sweet too, but I have a soft spot for Crab.  LD remarked that we share the same goofy facial expressions and mannerisms.  She cracks me up with her self-aware joking.

Tonight, LD and the kids went over to 74 and Zaftig's house, with Eyeball (the Family, as they used to call themselves), for Nora's birthday party. I felt left out and mildly resentful at the entire situation that has robbed me of old friends, as usual, but I am in a much more solidly grounded place psyche-wise nowadays and getting better slowly (I hope).  Unfortunately, afterwards I heard some really annoying and disturbing stuff about Zaftig.  LD told me she was making gross jokes about vagina restoration, certainly something she is copying from her new fancy super-rich Prestigius doctor friends.  But not cool, and disturbing to LD.  Especially, as LD said, Zaftig herself has been on the other end of that joke in her life.  (TMI!!)

Much more disturbing to me is the resurrection of a very old conversation, back when this first started, between Zaftig and LD.  Desperate to sway LD from me any way she could, Zaftig dragged me through the mud.  She characterized me as a quitter ("he'll walk away when things go bad"), as miles out of LD's league, as someone who LD should know better than go near because I am toxic, as someone who verbally tormented my Ex, as someone who dated a string of young women (ha!), as someone whose Ex was a 2 on the attractiveness scale while LD is a 10 (Zaftig is about a 3; I thought the Ex was cute), etc.  All very insulting and nasty.  It only reinforced my feeling that I am just fucking done with those people.  They are entitled to their opinion, but this insane passive aggressiveness just turns my stomach.