hello people i am killer, the dog of my daddy. right now he is stroking his gun and singing 'suicide is painless' to it. he doesnt feel like making a blog right now so he let me do an entry ok. yes ok.
i am one fierce dog. i have killed squirrels grrrrrrrr just the word squirrel grrrrrrr makes me grrrrrrrrrrrr. they chitter and squeak and i have to shake them. shake them shake them shake them shake them. and then they dont chitter or squeak or run any more. ha ha grrrr.
also one time i caught a cat and i shook it too. shake shake shake. but my daddy got upset and yelled and the cat ran away into a tree. my daddy wrote about this before and i would refer to that entry but i dont know how to hyperlink as i am a dog. come to think of it its amazing that i can type so accurately with these paws ha ha grrrr.
and another time after that i saw another cat and i ran but daddy yelled and hit me. i dont know why because i just wanted to shake that cat and maybe bite it just a tiny nip or two and see what color its insides are. i think they might be red. red red red ha ha grrr.
ok where was i?
ok yes well one time after that time after the other time that i first wrote about up there, my daddy and i went on a walk and we met all the other dogs in the neighborhood. there are lots and lots of us and we are a big friendly pack. we are all named killer because we are all so fierce. it is quite a coincidence. it is always 'oh hello killer, how are you?' 'oh i am just fine killer and you?' 'hey killer, i see a squirrel' and then we are all running and shouting and ha ha. and then it is all 'that was a close one killer' 'oh yes, killer, didn't he just run?' 'good job killer.'
anyway it is all fine and dandy running and jumping and smelling tails and boxing with paws and chewing sticks and suddenly one of the killers and i got into a big argument. it was all shouting this and yelling that and snarl grrrrr! and the biting without the teeth so we were all both covered in dog spit and grrrr and ill show you! but no real biting of course because we are not savages!
anyway the people managed to separate us after a while but it was pretty fun while it lasted going grrrr and i showed that killer something all right. she was always kind of a snob anyway. daddy says killers mommy was angry. killers mommy was angry because her dog lost and was scared and ran away with her tail between her legs ha ha grrrr! daddy said he apologized even though he didnt have anything to apologize for but killers mommy was still kinda mad and had her lips pursed and isnt very friendly now and avoids us now. even though daddy says i am a gentle submissive dog who would never start trouble and its really that killer who is a territorial bitch. but he also says even though i never start trouble i sure know how to finish it. i am one tough fierce dog ha ha grrr!
daddy read this and said it amused him and he could go on living one more day now.