A while back, I was walking in a parking lot when a twitchy, wild-eyed vagrant lady approached me and started giving me her spiel about being a Katrina victim and so on when all of a sudden she stopped cold, looked deep into my face, and said:
"Ohhhh, my, you have the most beautiful eyes... If I were ten years younger..."
Then she asked me for bus fare.
Today, I went to visit my father at the physical therapy center. A large, semi-literate, foul-mouthed woman who's in for drug addiction sat at his table. He told me later that she'd said to him that I was the "sexiest man she'd ever seen."
Cue Simpsons-esque disgusted shudder.
The other day at work, I saw two kindergarten girls, not in my class, in the hall who said they were going to "date" me. When I asked them what that meant, they collapsed into giggles.
You just wait twenty-five years, girls. You'll wonder what you were ever thinking.